Hell And Back (Rewrite)
by UKEndeavour
Summary: Takes place at 01x09, what if Stef's injuries from the shooting had been worse, how is the family going to cope? This is a rewrite (Disclaimer, I don't own The Fosters or Stef and Lena.)
1. Chapter 1

Hell And Back

_Hello all, this is a total rewrite of my first ever Stef and Lena story, I think now I'm a slightly better writer I'd try and make this story better, I hope you all enjoy it,_

_Thank you so much for reading, _

_Please enjoy. _

Chapter One

I know that we went into the house, I had to Jesus could have been in there with that woman, I don't care if she is his birth mother, she gave them up, she had her chance and she blew it he is OUR son. I wasn't going to wait for other officers or for anyone else for that matter, Jesus could have been in there and could have been in danger. The moment I saw the drugs I felt my heart racing, my son could have been exposed to this crack house. I never wanted him to experience that again. Mike and I did what we were trained to do, my training took over, we cleared the rooms. One by one, my gun drawn. I went into the bedroom, I didn't see him I heard the shot. Then I felt it. The sudden pain just before my left breast. I fell back onto the ground my gun falling beside me. I move for it. The pain is too much. I can't breathe something is wrong. My body was going into shock and I was panicking. Then I knew Mike was there, I heard his shots, three I think in total. Then he was above me,

"Mike," It was barely a whisper, he told me not to talk. I put my head back onto the ground not caring about how unclean the place was, I felt my eyes roll into the back of my head then Suddenly the world went back and I could just hear Mike calling for help.

I know at once that there are people rushing around me. I can hear a heart monitor beeping beside me. I've got a tube in my throat, I can't breathe alone. I can't feel my legs. I'm struggling to remember what's happened and what is now happening. i am awake. The doctors and nurses seem to know that as they are talking to me but I can barely open my eyes. That just takes more energy than I have right now. I am trying to think of anything but the pain I'm in. I know there is a nurse beside me pushing oxygen into me as I can't breathe on my own. I want Lena. I need to feel safe. She is the only person who has ever made me feel safe. I move my fingers. They've taken my ring. I want my ring. They've also removed my necklace I want that back too. They are the two things that make me feel like Lena is close when she's not. She gave me both. I can hear someone coming up beside me. it's my partner I can smell her. That smell is only Lena. She takes my hand, I want to talk to her. I want to tell her how much I love her. I can't. she is rubbing my hand.

"Hey, I'm here," Her voice Is breaking, she's scared. She is trying to hold it all together. I want to kiss her, I want to hold her. I try and make a noise. "The kids are okay, Jesus was…" She stopped I felt my heart racing, thank God that he was okay and hadn't been in that house. I can barely see her, she looks like she's going to cry, I don't want to cry. I've never wanted to hurt Lena. "He is here with Mariana and Brandon. We're all here." I felt her hand on my head then, her soft long fingers lost in my hair. She rarely touches me in public, she doesn't like PDA's after a nasty incident from her teens. Yet right now she's holding my hand and rubbing my head. I need to feel her and I can. I close my eyes at her touch. I never want her to let me go. I want her here forever. I know she will not leave me unless she is forcibly removed. I'm not thinking about my own physical pain right now I'm thinking of Lena's emotional pain. I love this woman is the last thought I have before I drift off thanks to the drugs I've been given.

I've been moved into a private room. I've had all my clothes cut off me now and I'm a hospital gown, well I think that's what it is, I've barely been awake. The pain isn't as bad as it was, but that could be to the drugs they seem to have bumped into my system. I want my woman. I know she's had to go to a waiting room while they sorted me out. I just want her hand in mine, I want to feel safe. Then I smell it, Lena's perfume. I want to open my eyes and yell I love you, but I have no energy to do that. The meds are keeping me knocked out. I can hear more than just Lena's heels on the floor. I feel Lena's hand on my arm and shoulder, her thumb moving along my arm, her light touch that I love so much.

"Honey, we're all here, Brandon, Mariana and Jesus, you're doing great and we love you." I can hear the love Lena's voice. I know my kids are here too now and they are all alright. That is the main thing. My babies are fine. I would do anything for them.

"Alright," I hear Lena say to our children, I feel Mariana touch my hand, I know because of her long finger nails. I can hear everyone leaving. I can hear Lena's voice but it seems so far away. I know she's not speaking to me. I want to kiss my babies before they go but I know that's not possible. I feel Lena back beside me. her fingers wrapped around my arm.

"B took the twins home, I'm trying so hard to forgive them." Oh my baby is blaming them, none of this was their fault. My lovely lady who would do anything for our kids was blaming them for me laying here. She needs to forgive them and once I can talk to her I will explain that too her. I'm not mad at them; they just wanted to know their biological mother. My kids didn't pull the trigger. "I'm sorry I'm not doing a better job," her voice is full of guilt. I just want to hold her. She feels guilty that she cannot forgive them. I know that as long as I give her time, she will. I just need to get better for her, for our kids and for me. "I'm not going anywhere babe, I'm staying right here," Lena whispered softly as she kissed my temple. This woman really is my rock, my life, my everything and right now she's the person I'm fighting for most.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

The last day or so has been a complete and utter blur. I know I've had major surgery and now i've got an oxygen tube up my nose, to help me get the right amount of oxygen into my blood. I'm yet to see Lena, only the doctor has been in to see me. There are three bullet fragments in my spinal canal. They have done a great deal of damage. I may never walk again. I want to cry, but more than that I want Lena. I want her near me, I'm so scared. My eyes are closed when I smell my baby, she's coming into the room. I hear her sit onto the chair beside my bed, pulling it forward towards the bed. Her long soft fingers rubbing my arm, I love this closeness. I felt her lips on my temple, her lips resting there for a few moments. It felt so good to have her so close. I make a noise the first one I've made since I said Mike's name at the scene. My throat is sore and it feels unused. Yet I have something important to ask her.

"No, no, no," She says, her voice is full of concern.

"Eh,"

"No, don't talk, don't talk" I manage to open my eyes, I can see her perfect face. The tears in her eyes, her hair which shows she slept in the chair beside my bed last night. Her hand is gripping mine as she sat beside me.

"Will you marry me?" My throat is sore, the words come out as a whisper. She looks shocked for a moment, I know it's not what she expected me to say first.

"I thought you'd never ask," She smiled.

"Neither did I," she laughed at that, the best sound in the world. There is nothing like the sound of my woman's laughter. "Is that a yes?" I ask still slightly unsure. She rubs my finger finding the finger that my ring should be on but it is still missing.

"Yes," She leant over and kissed my forehead. "Of course I want to marry you Stef, none of this changes anything," She pointed at the bed.

"Love," my voice broke, I didn't want to say what I had to say, "What if I can't walk again?" I need her, she kisses me knowing I need the closeness. Her fingers link mine.

"It will never change the way I feel about you, none of this will ever change that," I look into her eyes seeing nothing but love. This woman is remarkable and at the moment so emotional. Slowly tears ran down her face dripping from her nose. I reach up and slowly wipe away the falling tears. She reaches up and takes my hand, holding it to her face.

"I love you," she whispers at me.

"I love you too," I let Lena's words wash over me. she kisses the palm of my hand. Something she had not done in a long time.

"Are you going home today?" I ask.

"Yes, I need to see the kids, plus this chair is not made for me to sleep in,"

"I'm sorry about that,"

"It's not your fault. You didn't know that guy would have a gun or that he would use it." I can hear the anger in her voice. I know she hates guns but the fact that I've now been shot is making it worse.

"I should have called for back-up," I admit, slightly worn out.

"You wouldn't have done that. You thought Jesus was in there," I nod, she's so right. I thought our son was in danger. I was going into that house no matter what.

"If I had waited we wouldn't be here would we?" I ask,

"No," She admitted looking away, I held her hand harder.

"How are my babies?" I ask resting back against the pillows.

"They are scared, but they're good.

"Mariana?" I see a different look at Lena's face. She wants to forgive the twins. "Speak to her love, please. We love her she needs to know that,"

"I'll speak to her, are you okay for a moment?"

"Sure, erm, send B in if he is around,"

"Okay babe. I love you so much." Lena kisses my head again, they've all been told not to kiss my mouth at the moment because my oxygen levels were low.

"I love you too, you're coming back before you leave right?" I was worried she'd leave without me seeing her again,

"Of course I'll be back," She leaves and I get to watch her ass in those tight jeans. I must be feeling slightly better even if I'm rather sleepy. I close my eyes and rest against the back of the pillows suddenly wishing I had my own PJs on.

I open my eyes when I feel someone take my hand, I look up into the face of my handsome son. I take him in. He really did get the best of me and Mike. I still cannot get over that this sixteen year old young man is the same boy I gave birth too. Now his face is etched with worry. He shouldn't have to worry at his young age; he shouldn't see his mother laying with a gunshot wound either.

"Hey," I manage, he smiles, he has his father smile.

"Hey Mom, how are you feeling?" He took the seat Lena had left.

"Better than ever," I laugh. I know I'm pale and that my eyes aren't fully open. But this is the best I can manage right now.

"You don't look better than ever," Brandon took my hand.

"You know how to make a girl feel good," I can't laugh because it hurts. I need to stop with the bad jokes now.

"Always, I learnt from the best," He smiled. "Really through Mom, how are you?"

"I'm not sure B," I got serious. I've always been honest with him. It was the only way to explain most things since Lena and I got together. "I'm sure Mama explained,"

"Yeah she did,"

"Yeah well things are going to be hard,"

"I've already had the step up speech from Mama," I saw my grown up son now

"I wasn't going to give you that. It is going to be hard for us all B. Mama is scared, I'm scared. We're not sure what's going to happen. I just want you to know that you and everyone else don't have to be strong all the time."

"I know Mom," He kisses my forehead. It feels strange him kissing me. I hear a noise from the doorway. I can't help but smile when I see Lena standing there watching us. She walks over and Brandon moved. Lena looks at him before looking back at me and I simply nod. Lena softly takes my hand.

"Brandon, we have some news." Lena says slowly.

"What is it? More bad news?" it was like he was expecting it.

"No," I say at once.

"No B, No." Lena looks at me smiling before looking back at Brandon, "Your Mom asked me to marry her,"

"What?" he looks shocked. He had always wanted us to get married.

"I asked Lena to marry me,"

"I hope you said yes," He looks between the two of us.

"Yes, I said yes," Lena was smiling, she looks so happy.

"That is the best news," He kisses me and then hugs Lena. This is our little bit of joy that had come from the most terrible situation. Brandon kisses us again and left. I look at Lena.

"So, have you spoken to Mariana?" I rest her hand on my stomach.

"Yes I have. I told her DNA doesn't make a family, love does. I told her that we love her no matter what. "I smile at my woman's words. She has always been wise.

"You're right," She kisses my forehead as my doctor walks in.

Hi Stef, how are you feeling?" Dr Jackson asks me, while checking the machines and my file which is at the end of my bed.

"I'm okay," I lay there holding Lena's hand as he does a few more checks,

"Right, I've had a look at your X-rays, we've managed to remove all the fragments we can."

"Will I walk again?" I want him to be honest. Lena rubs her thumb against the back of my hand.

"It's not looking good Stef, you have no feeling in your legs. You're going to see the rehab nurse tomorrow and then you'll be moved to the rehab ward."

"So basically you're saying that Stef isn't going to walk again," Lena's voice is strong. I know she has gone into protective mode.

"Yes, I'm sorry," he signed the paperwork and left. All I want is a hug, I reach out and Lena walks into my arms and holds me as I know there is nothing else anyone can do.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter three

I've been moved in a rehab room, it's roomy which means that I can have all five children in the room. I've just had physical therapy and really was not feeling it. Only good thing to come from it was I'm now able to move from the bed to the wheelchair. I rest back against my pillows.

"Hey sweetheart? How are you feeling?" Lena asks as she walks into the room, dropping her purse onto the chair and taking my hand. I look deep into those sexy brown eyes.

"I don't know," I say, As I close my eyes.

"Okay," Lena says, I know she doesn't want to push me.

"Where are my babies?"

"They're at home, fighting over the shower,"

"Sounds like bliss," I felt the tears coming, I turned my head to one side in hopes to hide them. My heart is breaking. Knowing that I'll never walk again. so far I've only cried alone at night when I've been alone. I feel Lena's lips on mine. I open my eyes letting the tears fall.

"Please don't hide from me," Lena whispers softly. Its those words that break me. I start openly crying. Holding onto her.

"I feel like I've let you down," I cry.

"You have never and will never let me or your family down. None of this is your fault,"

"It sort of us,"

"How so?"

"I went into that house without any protection."

"Yes to get our son, you thought he was in danger you put your family first." Lena pushes my hair out of my face.

"I should have thought before I walked into that house,"

"No, you thought Jesus was in there. You of all people should know you'd do anything for our kids. It's one of the many things I love about you," Lena says as she kisses me.

"Love I can't move my legs," I say completely honestly. She just looks into my eyes.

"We will get through this. The builders are already at the house making the place wheelchair friendly for you, as a family we are going to get through this. As your wife-to-be I will support you no matter what. I love you Stef. You're amazing. We are going to do this together." I can feel Lena's love. It is amazing to me. she's got so much passion in her voice. She's so strong. I sometimes forget that.

"You've so much faith in us don't you?"

"That is because I love you, more than anything else in the world. You're mine. I'm going to be here every step of the way,"

"I love you too babe." I say as she moves around the bed and sits back down on the chair beside it. She grabs her wallet out of her bag.

"Would you like some coffee?"

"Can I really have some?" I've not been allowed any.

"Yeah," She's laughing at me, "I spoke to Jon early and he says it's fine," Jon is my rehab nurse. He is amazing.

"That would be awesome," I grin, "You really know how to treat a girl,"

"Always," Lena said as she got up, kissing my lips before leaving for a few moments to get the coffee. While she is gone I lay back thinking about my family, the changes that must be happening to the house, how the kids are going to cope. I want to go home. I know that this is happening soon. I can smell fresh Starbucks. Lena comes in grinning. Holding coffee. Wow I love this woman.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter four.

Today has been a good day, a really good day. I've spent time with all five of my babies. I watched Mariana paint her nails, Brandon showed me a video of him playing his new piece of music he had written, Jesus talked about volleyball, Callie played her guitar for me and Jude showed me his English homework. It felt so normal. I'd missed their laughter. After they'd had time on their own with me we'd playing a game on my tray. It had been amazing. They had giggled and laughed and I'd been able to make all the jokes I'd wanted too. Once I had started to get tired they had decided to head home. Lena had gone home while the kids where with me so that I could have alone time with them. She'd also gone to get me some clean PJs. I know that she has completely forgiven the twins. I was given hugs and kisses an the kids headed home leaving me with Lena. She walks over and kisses me softly on the lips.

"Hey," I say taking her in, Noticing today she is wearing my shirt.

"Hey," She says as she pushes my hair away from my temple. You know, I'm loving the amount of kisses and touches I'm getting.

"How are you?" I ask slowly as she sits down.

"I'm good, had a lovely shower, cleaned up some of the mess that our kids have made. Now I'm all yours."

"I thought you always were," I laugh.

"Yes I am," She kisses me again. I reach up and stop her from moving back meaning our foreheads were resting against each other's and our eyes are locked. I knew I had to be honest with her.

"Love, I feel like crap," she frowns at once. She hates the word but it's the only I can find to decide how I feel.

"What? Are you hurting?" She pulls away looking up and down, trying to work out if I was in pain.

"No, I want to go home, I want to sleep in my own bed. Be with my family, recover around the people I love most. It just feels like I'm not going to be doing that any time soon. I can't even get out of bed to use the bathroom without a little bit of help. I can't walk. I've let you all down completely. The kids all look at me like I'm going to break I'm scared of…" she stops me, completely stops me by kissing my lips.

"It is going to be a long road but you know what?"

"What?"

"we're here for you, me and the kids. You're getting the best care and you're going to be back home before you know it."

"I…" She stops me again putting her long finger onto my lips.

"Stefanie Marie Foster, you are going to listen to me okay?" I nod, feeling that's all I can do right now. "It's more important to me and to our kids that you get better. You're everything to me, Our children love you. Our family would fall apart without you. Yeah it's going to be a long road. I'm here every step of the way. No if's, no buts, just here. I love you so much Stef it hurts, really hurts sometimes." I pull her down for a kiss. As we are kissing I hear someone clear their throat in the doorway. We break apart and I see someone I never expected to see. I've been in hospital for two weeks, I've had calls from my Mom but not my father, now he is in the doorway of my hospital room looking at me like I'm a naughty child. I know how he feels about me being gay, but I won't let him win at the moment. I need her more than anyone else right now. I grip her hand and in that moment I knew she didn't want to move away from me. she held my hand and sat herself beside me.

"Hey,"

"Hi Dad, how are you?" I ask, he looks at me before coming into the room. I see my father's distaste at the fact that Lena is holding my hand. He has never been disrespectful of her but he has serious issue with the fact that I love a woman.

"Shouldn't I be asking you that?" He says with a small smile before answering "I'm good, how are you?"

"I've felt a lot better," I admit. He stands on the other side of my bed.

"From the message Mike left he said you'd been shot badly," He says slowly. His voice is full of concern. I just couldn't get over the fact it had taken him all this time

"I've got bullet fragments in my spinal canal. I can't move my legs."

"Oh dear God, Stef," he reaches out like he going to touch me but he stops himself and pushes his hands into his pockets. I know I'm going to have to speak.

"They are still doing tests, but it's not looking good," I say, not taking my eyes off him, suddenly glad that Lena' s hand is in mine reminding me that I have her support.

"What am I supposed to tell your mother?"

"I've already spoken to Sharon," Lena says slowly, I knew she'd spoken to her, as Mom was getting ready to fly over to see me.

"Oh," Was all my father could say.

"She's going to fly out next week. She was going to come sooner if Stef was still in a coma but she's doing fine,"

"I don't think she's doing fine, she can't move her legs," My father's voice is suddenly bitter. I know he must be hurting but I am not letting him take it out on Lena. He already blames her for enough without this being added to the list

"I am here you know dad," I say "I'm fine because I'm breathing, I'm awake, I'm alive and I have my family and my fiancé," I say without thinking, once it is out I see the look on his face but I don't care, I love Lena so completely.

"Fiancé?" my own father sounds disgusted with the thought of me sleeping with another woman but now for me to marry her it sounded worse.

"Yes,"

"You can't…"

"Don't say it dad," I say not wanting him to say it. "Lena and I can legally get married now. We are going too. You don't have to support, just respect it," He nodded after a few moments.

"I'll be going," He couldn't get out of the room fast enough and I didn't have the energy to chase or yell after him. I just looked at the door. I feel Lena's lips on my temple. It's so soft.

"I'm sorry," She whispered against my ear.

"What for?" I ask slowly.

"what your…"

"No, that is not you, that's all on him, I wish I could explain it. I don't know what to say after that, he is just so bitter."

"Tell you what, shall I cheer you up, give you a bath and changed your PJs?"

"I'm allowed a bath?" I ask, my excitement showing.

"Yes," Lena giggles at me. "Jenny is going to come and help us,"

"Today has just gotten better," I laugh as Jenny walks in with my wheelchair.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter five

I'm going home. I can't believe it, it's finally happening. it's been eight weeks since I left the house to get Jesus, now I'm going home. I've got a light weight sports wheelchair that my insurance through the state has bought for me. I know the house has been made wheelchair friendly. I also know that the house is perfect because Lena has overseen to everything, I feel so lucky. I've landed on my feet with my wife. She's been so loving and caring and I know I can't do this without her. I've signed up for physical therapy, I'm hoping to stand and dance on our wedding day. Something I want surprise Lena with. I'm signing the papers for my discharge when I see Lena coming into the ward.

"Hey, do you come here often?" I ask, she grins, that sexy grin that only I get.

"Only when there is someone worth visiting,"

"Ah, I hear she is leaving today,"

"Oh really?" Lena laughs, "I'll have to find someone else then," she kisses my forehead. "It's good to see you in such a good mood,"

"Of course I am, I'm coming home. To my family," I smile as I finish signing the paperwork.

"Good because we've missed you," Once I'd signed the paperwork we made our way out to the car, I smile. I really can't help it. I get to the car and transfer myself from my chair into the car. I watch as Lena puts my chair into the back. I'm going home, I really cannot believe this. I've been looking forward to this. Lena hopped into the drivers seat. I'm so used to driving, it's slightly strange having Lena in that seat,

"What?" She asks reaching over, she took my fist. When did I clench that?

"I don't know, Lena."

"Yeah." She says as she pulls out of the space in the parking lot.

"I'm sorry for the pain I've caused you. I know this isn't easy for you or the kids or me for that matter, but I feel like It's partly my fault. Something in me makes me want to protect you and our kids over everything else and that includes my own safety. I've hurt you so much with this. You hate guns and I've now got a bullet and fragments in my back." I stop. We've stopped at a red light.

"I'm not in pain baby. All I want is for you to be better."

"Lena you've cried more in the last three weeks then in our ten year relationship. I've seen the pain in your eyes. I don't want that anymore."

"Well I've got you home and that means the world to me." I smile we pull into our driveway. Wow there is ramp up to our front door. I love it. I can get around. Which is important. I wait for Lena to bring my chair and transfer myself to it. I decide to go in the back door so that I'm in our kitchen. I wheel myself in. there is noise in the dinning room it sounds like the kids are playing a game. Lena had come in the front door so that the kids still don't know I'm back I can hear her talking to them. Before Brandon comes into the kitchen he stops looking at me.

"Mom." He just stands looking at me. I can't help but laugh. "MOM." He runs to me. I put the break on just in time as he threw himself at me. I forget that in this handsome young man is my little child. He hugs me so hard. I rub his back and close my eyes as I suddenly feel all my kids, including Callie and Jude hugging me. Wow. I can't believe how much love I feel. I'm crying I know. My babies are holding me, my our kitchen. It feels amazing. they let me go. I look around before pushing my tears away I look into Lena's eyes who is standing in the door way looking at me, crying herself.

"Hey babies." I say.

"Why didn't you tell us you where coming home?" Mariana said. Holding my hand.

"We didn't really know it was going to happen we were waiting for my chair. Plus I had to sign up for physical therapy."

"I love you chair." Jude says. It's blue and he has a thing for blue.

"Thanks bud." I looked at my kids. The joys that made me smile and laugh and get angry. They make me feel so alive. Lena comes over and kisses me on the mouth. I love that. I'm home and I'm getting kisses.

"Eww seriously do you two have too?" Jesus says he is grinning. I pull Lena onto knee and kiss her again she's giggling as we pull away to vomiting noises from Jesus.

"Watch it young man." I say grinning. "One day you'll be doing."

"Can't you do it in private."

"No." Lena and I say together. They all start laughing. I look around. My amazing family and I know this is the start of my road to recovery.

I've made it up to our bedroom. I'm now in my bed on my side. I love it. Lena is in the bathroom. We've had a lovely family evening. With me on the sofa, together watched a movie and we had pizza. It was lovely. I'm now watching my woman come out of the bathroom, wearing her PJs she gets into bed and turns to me. As I can't move too well at the moment, I lift my arm up, she puts her head onto my shoulder and I can put my hand into her curly hair. Her head resting on my shoulder and her arm around me. making sure she doesn't push my still healing wound.

"This feels good." I say softly. Kissing her forehead.

"Yes. I've missed this. Missed having you here."

"I missed the room." She laughs.

"Trust you."

"I love you sweetie." I grin. She looks at me.

"I love you too. I can't believe I nearly lost you." She suddenly looks so serious.

"I'm sorry for that babe, we need to look forward now. We've got a wedding to plan."

"Yeah our wedding."

"Yes. you and me finally showing the world our love. We can wear our rings on our left hands and show the world that I'm completely and utterly in love with you."

"Wow some speech that Stef."

"It's completely true." I reply. "You're my lady." We kiss on the lips and suddenly I'm tired. She runs her fingers down my side. I feel myself drifting off in her arms. Loving the fact that this woman is mine and that I'm home.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Today I've been to physiotherapy. I lay there and she moved my legs. They are still strong. I'm back home. My mom, thank God has gone back to Florida. Lena is making dinner and I've decided to help. With a little help I'm on a stool which mom bought me. which has a back so I can relax more. I'm now cutting up the salad. I hear the front door open.

"Our peace is shattered." Lena grins as all five kids come in from school. I smile as they pile into the kitchen, I get a kiss from everyone.

"can I help?" Jude asked.

"You got any homework bud?" I ask.

"No, I did it with my tutor."

"Okay, you can help wash you hands." He goes off to do that. I watch as the other four get drinks. And Mariana comes over and put her arms around my shoulders.

"What can I do for you Miss Thing?" I ask.

"Mom can I ask you something."

"Sure."

"We've all been talking and we wanna know, do you think you'll walk again." I look around at my children. We've not spoken to them about it. all the changes in the house can be removed. Lena looks at me and comes up behind me. she puts her arms around my waist and her head onto my shoulder as the kids sit on the other side of the table look at me.

"We don't know is the true answer." I say slowly. I like to be honest with them there is no point in lying. "I'm having physiotherapy and they are trying to help me. but it's not a grantee."

"So what is going to happen?" Jesus asks.

"I don't know Bub. I know that I'm going to try my hardest but at the moment I'm feeling just lucky to be alive."

"I'm sorry mom." Mariana says softly. I look at her.

"Lets put this on the table okay." I say. "I don't blame either of you. I don't understand why you did it but that's a different matter. I went to that house because I thought Jesus was in danger I would do that for any of you. I'd do it again tomorrow. I didn't expect to get shot. We're not going to keep going over this as Mama has said, DNA doesn't make a family Love does and I love you lot more than life. I love you mama more than anything else. We as a family are going to get through this. If I walk again or not okay?" they all nodded and I feel Lena kiss me.

"Right who is helping with dinner." She suddenly says knowing that the topic needs changing and that we need t get food ready. Jude comes back in and sits next to me cutting up same salad and before I know it my kids are all doing jobs and helping out. I look at Lena who is putting the meat into the oven and smile. I'm getting a great view.

"Enjoying the view there mom." I turn to Brandon who just grins at me. I know Mike is coming for him shortly so he won't be having dinner but he is still helping.

"What can I say. I have to admire it."

"What are you talking…" Lena turns and my eyes are still looking where her ass was. "Stef please." She smiles. I laugh as there is a load knock on the door. Lena goes to answer it while I laugh with my children. Soon there are giggles all around while we mess around. This is how Lena and Mike find us. Lena just grins. I know she loves seeing me and our children happy and right now we're all very happy. I see the look on Mike's face. He has never seen us like this. He looks at my wheelchair which is next to me as Lena comes over and kisses me.

"What are you lot doing?"

"Having fun." Jude replied I laugh and rub his head. He is so right we are. We're enjoying ourselves. It's the first time Mike's seen my wheelchair. Lena helps me down and I get into it and go over to him.

"Hey."

"Hey, how are you?" I ask, looking up at him

"Good, erm you?"

"Never better." I smile. He smiles back at me.

"How are uh things going for you."

"Slow, I've had my legs moved around by a hot woman today."

"I heard that." Lena laughed.

"Oh it wasn't Lena?" Mike said completely serious. Lena could tell I was joking around.

"It's the 50 year old physiotherapist. Who looks like she does way too much Yoga." I laugh. Plus she's not my type."

"You have a type?" Lena said.

"Yeh and there is one woman who fits it and that is you." Lena smiles and kisses my head. I look back at Mike. He was watching us. Brandon walks around and kisses me and then Lena.

"Right come on dad." Mike nodded. "Where we going?"

"Thought we'd go to the Grill."

"Yeh sounds good." B smiles. Rubbing my shoulder. I show them to the door and watch them go. After B tells me he loves me. I watch them go. Lena watching me. I know she is. Lena leans down and kisses me. I look at her.

"Shall we have dinner."

"MARIANA can you set the table please." Lena yells,

"SURE MOM." Mariana's voice returns. I grin.

"What are you grinning at sweetheart?" She says,

"The normal stuff."

"What do you mean?" She asked taking my hand and playing with my ring. We're still wearing our rings on our right hands.

"The normal stuff we get up too."

"We're never going to be normal love." Lena says. I smile. We kiss again before joining our children for dinner.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Lena's had an email from the wicked ex girlfriend. She wants to meet us. I'm not sure if Lena has told her what happened the night she had dinner with us at the house but we've agreed to meet her for dinner tonight. Which scares me. what if Lena suddenly looks at her and see something like she can walk and runs off with her. I know I'm being stupid. I love Lena and I know she loves me back, I've done my hair, putting it in a ponytail, when Lena walks in wearing an amazing dress. I'm wearing smart trousers and a shirt.

"Wow." I say.

"Wow at you."

"You helped me dress." I laugh. She walks over and bends down.

"So, I can still think you're very hot."

"erm. I love you, you know that don't you." She kisses me. her head falling over my face.

"I know I love you, what's bought this on."

"Erm." I look down. Lena put her hand under my chin. Making me look at her.

"Is this because we're going to see Gretchen?" I nod. "I don't and never have or will want another woman. You Stephanie Marie Foster are everything I've ever wanted. I don't want Gretchen I don't even know what I saw in her. the only reason we're going to dinner is to make up for what happened five weeks ago. Okay?" Lena hates falling out with people. I nod and kiss her again. "I love you too much. What has happened has made me realise that I can't live without you."

"I love you too love."

"Are you ready?"

"Yeah." I say. Knowing that tonight is going to be hard. We're going to a posh restaurant that Gretchen had chosen. I'm not sure if I like this woman after all her comments about Lena, the fact she cheated on my Lena. Lena is still looking at me.

"Are you sure about this Stef?"

"I'm still me love,"

"I know you just look scared."

"I keep thinking you'll leave me." I'm suddenly being too honest. She puts her hands on either side of my face.

"Stef, I love you. For ten years there has only been you. Gretchen was never the woman for me. for eighteen months she put me through more than you ever have so get that thought out of your head please."

"Okay" we kiss once before Lena puts the money out for the kids and we make our way out of the house.

We arrive a little late at the restaurant and I manage to transfer myself into my chair as the valet parker comes around to get into Lena's side. I move out of the way and get myself onto the sidewalk. Lena put her hand onto my shoulder as we can't hold hands and make our way into the restaurant. I see Gretchen sitting at a table in the far corner of the outdoor section. They had been told that I'm in my chair. She looks up as we come closer she gets up. Her face in shock. It's then I realise that Lena didn't mention what happened. When we get to the table she kisses Lena. And then looks at me. I hold out my hand and we shake hands. She's wearing a tight fitting black number. Lena moves the seat out of the way as the waiter comes to get it. and I can fit myself at the table.

"Hello you two." Gretchen says as Lena moves so she's closer to me than her, taking my hand in hers. I smile. I can't help it. Lena usually won't take my hand in public because of the things that have happened to her in the past when she's been hurt due to showing affection to her woman.

"Hi," Lena says. "How are you?"

"I'm great, how are you two?"

"I'm good." I say. Gretchen is looking at me like she wants to ask.

"We're good." Lena says as the waiter comes over.

"May I get you drinks?"

"I'll have an OJ please." I ask, I can't have wine or anything at the moment because of the meds that are helping me heal.

"I'll have the same." Lena said.

"You can have wine if you want babe." I say. She smiles.

"But…"

"Just because I can't drink doesn't mean you can't."

"Okay, I'll have red please by the glass." Lena says. Gretchen is watching us.

"I'll have a red too." The waiter left. I look at Gretchen who is looking at our hands linked together. Lena had become so affectionate since the shooting and I'm loving it.

"So erm. May I ask what the hell happened?" Lena frowns at the use of the word hell.

"What do you mean?" Lena said.

"Well the last time I saw you five weeks ago Stef was walking."

"I am here." I say. "And what happened was the night we had dinner with you I went to get Jesus who we thought was in danger and was shot." I say very matter of fact.

"Oh God. Are you okay?" Gretchen says slowly. Her hand under her chin. I can see how jealous she is. Something I couldn't see last time. maybe because I was trying to get on with her for Lena. But now I can't be bothered with it.

"Well apart from the fact I can't stand or use my legs I'm brilliant."

"Stef," Lena gives me one of her many looks and I smile.

"Sorry." I say. Lena just moves her fingers slowly over my hand.

"You two look more loved up than last time I saw you and you were loved up then." Gretchen says. we both look at her.

"Well seeing Stef nearly die." Lena started. "Has made me rethink a lot of things and I'm very lucky to have Stef in my life. We also sorry about what happened on the night you came to dinner at the house." Lena says slowly

"What do you mean? The way I left. I think that was down to me going on about marriage."

"Well, we're getting married." I say.

"What?"

"First words Stef says to me when she comes round from being shot where 'will you marry me?" Lena laughs. I hadn't thought about it like that.

"And you jumped at it."

"Not really she said 'I thought you'd never ask'" I grin. As our drinks arrive and we order our meals.

"So you're getting married."

"Ten years in we are making it more official." Lena says.

"I made it official when I gave you my ring the first time babe." I say. I look at Lena. Both of us grinning. Gretchen cleaner her throat.

"How are you coping?" She asked. She's looking at Lena. I know that look. Lena looks at me like that. It's lust.

"We're doing fine." Lena says. not noticing the look. She looks at me and sees me frowning.

"Well you look strong enough." Gretchen says to me.

"I have to be I've got a woman and five kids who need me." I say. I watch Gretchen through out the meal. We talk but she's looking at Lena. Maybe I didn't notice it last time. but she wants my woman. Lena goes to the loo I look at the woman as we wait for our desserts.

"Is there a reason you're lusting after Lena." I ask. Gretchen looks at me slightly shocked.

"I don't know what you mean," She says. her voice is slick. It's like she could charm anyone into bed with her.

"Yes you do. I've been watching you. You look like you want to jump on her."

"Well, she's still an attractive woman."

"She always has been. But you still cheated on her."

"I can't help myself Stef. You know how it is?"

"No I don't." I say. "I would never cheat on Lena. Why would I?"

"To try another woman. You've only ever been with Lena."

"She's all I've ever wanted."

"You don't want to know what it's like."

"I don't' need to know." I say. As Lena comes back to the table but I'm not about to shut up. "Why would I want anyone other than Lena, I'm sorry but have you seen her. she's my lady. I woke from being shot and the first person I saw was her. she's completes my world but turning my question around on me still hasn't answered it." Lena sits down.

"What's going on?" She asked, I look at her and slowly run my fingers down her bare arm.

"I asked your ex why she is lusting after you?"

"Stef."

"I need to know. I can't sit here watching her look at you like she wants you to fall into her bed with her."

"The only person I want to fall into bed with is you."

"I know I trust you love. It's her I don't." I look at Gretchen who looks back at me.

"yes I lust after Lena. For eighteen months she was mine. Now I'm alone and she has the family and the woman she always wanted. plus you're not the person I expected her to end up with."

"What do you mean?" Lena asked.

"Well she's a cop. She has a gun. You're so anti guns. She's been shot now."

"I'm well aware that she's been shot you don't' need to point it out.."

"She's also the only white woman you've been with." I look shocked. I hadn't realised this was Gretchen's problem.

"Stef's heritage is nothing. Like mine is to her. I fell in love with the person. She's amazing, she has a her flaws. But you know what Gretchen she isn't the bitch you are." With that she got up. "Come on honey let's go home." I push back and we leave. I hold her hand as we wait for our car.

"I love you." I whisper. She smiles. Looking down at me.

"I've got a great few here." I look up and notice that Lena is looking down my top.

"I'm not sure we can you know."

"Can we try?" she asked. I look into her eyes and nod. We look as Gretchen comes out. Just as our car arrives. Lena just walks over to the car and I slowly make my way to the other side and she watches as I move myself over and Lena puts my chair into the car. I watch Gretchen. As Lena gets into the car I ask the question that haunts me.

"Whatever did you see in her?"

"My mother's choice not mine. It was what she was pushing me towards. Who'd have known that I didn't need that. I needed a crazy ass cop instead" I laugh. I look back just as we move to see Gretchen watching us. I don't' care. I lean over and kiss Lena.

"Lets go home and see if we can do anything."

"other stuff." I hear Lena whisper and smile as she drives us home.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Wow. I feel so good. Since last night. Lena and I have made love a number of times. Once we worked out what I could and couldn't do. This morning we're giggly. As we make breakfast. As it's Saturday, we've all slept in late. It's now just after Ten and I'm carrying the bagels on my lap to the table. I'm determined to get back to normal. As I put them down Jesus comes in. wearing a shorts and t-shirt.

"Need a hand there Mom?" He asked as I slide it onto the table.

"Just pull it into the middle please Jesus." He did so. I smiled as he got milk from the fridge when he had finished. I went over and made myself some coffee, also pouring a cup for Lena. Putting Lena's mug between my knees I move to her, where she sat on a stool near the door. When I get to her I pass it too her. she smiles.

"Thank you,"

"It's okay love." I wink at her before moving away as the rest of the kids all come in soon there is noise. Everyone is talking and getting breakfast. I go up the ramp, I go into our downstairs bathroom. I managed to get to the toilet do what I want to do, usually I ask for help but I'm starting to do things more and more for myself. I want to be independent again. I want Lena to be able to go back to work. I've managed to put my jeans back on and slowly moving myself when my chair moved, I missed hitting my head on the side of the toilet as I hit the floor. I hear my slight scream.

"STEF." I heard Lena before I saw her. I looked up seeing her bending down. In the doorway I can make out the kids. I just look at Lena.

"Sorry."

"Don't be. Are you okay?" Lena asked, looking at me. she puts her hand up to my head were I've banged it. there is slight cut and I pull away as it hurts.

"I'm okay, just a bit sore."

"Right lets get you up and we can clean the cut. Brandon can you help." I feel my son and my girlfriend help me up into my chair. I realised I hadn't put my break on, what an idiot.

"This is my fault." I say. Lena just looks at me.

"No Stef, it happens."

"I didn't put the brake on Lena." She looks at me. before kissing me.

"It happens. Now lets get you clean up." I look around and see the kids have all gone. Maybe her kissing me did it. she gets the first aid kit out. She cleans me up. I look at her. she's so gentle.

"I'm sorry."

"Stop it Stef please. You are going to have accidents. I wan you to be as independent as possible but sometimes, you going to have to ask for help."

"I feel like a burden." I admit, I didn't mean it to come out. She looks at me. deep into my eyes.

"Why would you ever think you're a burden Stef?" Her hands finding mine.

"I'm in a wheelchair I'm learning to do things again, I got myself shot. I feel like I've put too much on you."

"Well the summer break starts next week so I'd be off anyways. I'm going back to work for the fall term. By then I want us to be married." I nod. She kisses my hands. Before looking deep into my eyes. "You're not a burden. You're my woman, my lover, my best friend. I've never felt like this and you know that." She runs her hand down my face.

"Let's set a date." I whisper. She smiles.

"I would love to marry you in July."

"That's only two months away love."

"we can do it. I don't care if you're standing or not. I want to marry you, I want to be Mrs Adams-Foster." She grins at me.

"Wow you've even thought of the surname we should have." I grin.

"Yeh well it was always going to be our names together we can't lose Foster as three of the kids are Foster. So I thought…" I kiss her.

"I love it. I want to be Mrs Adams-Foster too." she smiles at me.

"You're going to have a nasty burse where you've hit your head. The cut is small though."

"Thanks, sorry I really am."

"Stef. Stop it okay." I nod. "Shall we do something to take your mind of it."

"What do you have in mind?"

"I've found a website where we can design our own wedding rings." I smile. She's excited. I take her hand and kiss it.

"Come on then." We go into the dinning room. I look around and can see the kids have cleaned up and are getting ready for their day. Mariana and Jesus come to me.

"We're going to Lexi's."

"Okay back for dinner please." I say, they both kiss me.

"Love you Mom." They both tell me one by one. I kiss them both back

"Love you babies. Be safe." They leave. I grin as Brandon comes in

"Right Mom, Lena I'm going to dad's."

"Doing anything good?" I ask.

"duno yet" He hugs me. "Love you Mom,"

"I love you too," he kisses me and leaves.

"Is everyone going to say I love you today."

"You never know. Callie has gone to group and Jude has gone to see his friend Connor." Lena says. as I boot up the laptop.

"Good, so we're alone." I wink. She laughs taking the laptop from me and going in the website. We spend the next three hours designing two matching rings. One in my size one in hers. we've decided on the date so I've started writing the invites out while Lena makes us both some coffee.

"Babe, do you think we should seen Jenna and Kelly an invite each."

"Yeh," Lena says slowly. "They are living apart now Jenna's moved into an apartment." She puts the coffee down.

"I didn't know."

"You've had other things on your mind." Lena says rubbing my shoulder.

"I still can't believe they've broken up. I remember you introducing me to them. They were so happy to see you happy."

"I remember. That was the first time you meet all my friends at a party, you where so scared."

"I'd only be out a few weeks when that happened. And I didn't know how to act."

"The same way you always do." She smiles at me. I go back to writing them out. I've wrote one for my mom, my dad, her parents.

"Do I have to send the kids invites."

"I think it would be nice." Lena says. I grin.

"How about we ask Jude to be our ring bearer."

"Oh that's sweet." Lena smiles, kissing my cheek. We are still writing invites out when Callie and Jude come in.

"Hey guys, good day?" Lena asked, as I push the last of the invites to one side. They come in and Jude hugs me.

"Can Connor come over next week for dinner?" He asked. I smile, glad that he feels so open with Lena and I.

"Sure bud." I say looking at Lena who is nodding. Callie smiled as us.

"How was your day Callie?" Lena asked.

"Good, group was boring."

"Nothing new there then." I smile. They both go off to their bedroom after we'd spoken for a few moments. I grin. I push back Lena watches me.

"Are you okay?" Lena asked me. she smiled. I put my hand to my head.

"Yeh I'm good babe. I love you."

"Good." Lena smiled. "I love you too what do you fancy for dinner?"

"You." I say without thinking. She laughs. Kissing me.

"Don't start Stef, what do you really want?"

"to be truthful?"

"Yes." Lena ginned.

"I would really, really like a spicy pizza." She grins.

"You want to order in."

"Nah, when I ordered the shopping online. I got the things for us to make our own."

"When did you get so smart?" Lena asked, I just simply looked at her.

"They day I came out and told you I wanted you."

"What are you like? Right shall we make pizza and have a great time doing it." She goes to the stairs. "JUDE, CALLIE YOU WANNA HELP MAKE PIZZA." Jude ran down as I slowly made my way into the kitchen. I picked up my phone and went outside. I wanted to call my mom. I smiled at Lena. Who grinned.

"I'll be a few minutes, I want to talk to my mom."

"Okay babe." Lena starts to get the stuff start making pizza's. I went outside and moved into the garden. I hit the button and phoned my mom.

"Hey Stef."

"Hi mom. I need your help?"

"For what love?"

"I want to walk at our wedding, I want to be able to stand. I'm not sure if it's possible but I don't want to try for me and Lena."

"Aww Sweetie. I'm going to help you. Do you want me to come back."

"I would love that Mom, just to give Lena a break. I know you're busy and…"

"I'm never too busy for you Stef. You know that."

"Well give it a week and come down please."

"I can do that. Have you told Lena?"

"No, I want to do this for her mom. She looks after me so well." I turn my chair because I feel someone watching me. it's Lena. I smile at her. she smiles back. "I fell today mom and she's made it all okay."

"She's your woman Stef she's supposed too." I laugh at my moms' comments.

"So I'll email you okay?"

"Thanks Stef, love you and we'll get you walking."

"Thanks Mom. Love you too bye." With that I put the phone down and went in. smiling at the fact that everyone was now making their own personal pizza's I moved and got onto my stool. Lena smiled that I managed to do it alone.

"Your Mom okay?" She asked

"Yeh. She's fine. Do we all get to make our own."

"Yeh, even you Stef." She kissed me. before giving me a base and BBQ sauce I was happy. The kids around me. all of us laughing and joking. I looked at Lena, who was watching us all. I grin. Knowing that I'm going to make her year, when I marry her.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

My mom is staying at a hotel in town and has started talking me to physiotherapy. Giving Lena some alone time, which I know she's using to organise our wedding. I'm trying so hard. But my legs won't do want I want them to do and it's depressing me. I can see I'm falling apart. I'm scared. Mom has dropped me off at home and I'm alone for the first time since I was in hospital. I get the iPad and move into the living room. Sitting on the sofa, my chair beside me. I found the clothes I wanted to wear for the wearing. I'm going for white dress pants and a matching white shirt. I order it. before looking through our emails. I stop. the wedding is two weeks ago and I'm not sure I'm going to be able to walk to Lena. I can barely stand. When I do I can't move. they just don't' work. Debbie my physiotherapist, keeps telling me it's normal. I want everything to be perfect for Lena. She's doesn't deserve this. I can feel the tears as I'm looking at shoes. I put my iPad to one side and rubbed my face. I didn't hear the front door. I didn't even know anyone had come home. The only reason I know is when Lena's arms are around me. she rubs my hair.

"Stef, what is it babe?" I don't know if I should just tell her. I just find myself sobbing. Holding onto my wife-to-be. For the first time since being shot I've fallen apart. I'm resting in the arms of my lover. She is simply rubbing my back, hugging me and making me feel better. I can't tell her can I? maybe I should. Talking about it helps. Something I've learnt since Lena came into my life. I managed to stop crying. "Talk to be sweetheart please. You're scaring me."

"Sorry." I manage. She rubs my back, pulling back. she kisses my lips.

"Please talk to me babe."

"Okay, I've been trying to walk, which is why mom has been here."

"What do you mean?" she looks at me a little shocked.

"Mom has come because I wanted to walk to you on our wedding day. It's not going to happen Lena." I say suddenly. I can feel the tears again. I rub them. Glad I'm not wearing make up.

"I don't care." My face falls. How can you not care. She puts her hand onto my face. Slowly moving her fingers along my face. Making me look at her.

"You…"

"Babe, please listen. I don't care. In two weeks you'll be my wife. I love you. I don't care if you can't walk because I have you. Please understand that. I love you no matter what. You're everything I've ever wanted. I just want you."

"I've let you down." I say looking into her dark eyes that show all her emotions.

"No," I see what she is saying right. "you could never let me down. You're the love of my life. I still want to marry you Stef, my feelings for you haven't changed. They never will. I know it's hard for you to believe this right now. You've having a hard time coming to terms with what happened."

"I always thought I'd be on my feet again. I feel so weak love." I admit. I'm going to totally open up to her. It's time I let it all go before it eats me up inside.

"You're not weak. Your spine is struggling to cope. You can feel your legs but you spine and nerves are weak. The doctor explained that." I nod.

"I so wanted to for you." She kisses me.

"Do it for you," She says.

"For us. I love you Lena. I don't know what I'd do without you. These past weeks you've been amazing. I've fallen apart. I'm sorry."

"I will never leave you Stef. I've never given you reason to question that. Ten years on with all your comments, your flaws your positives. I love who you are. Remember that. I don't care if you can't walk to me. I just care that you turn up and you marry me okay?" I grin at her words she's right. It's more important that we get married.

"I wouldn't wanna be anywhere else." She kisses me again. "I love you."

"Can you two please put each other down." Jesus says as he comes in. I laugh.

"Why would I wanna put your mama down."

"Because you're an old married couple."

"Not yet." I grin. "But in two weeks. We will be." Lena grins. At the change in me. I know I've not let her down now.

"Right it's game night so Stef it's your turn to pick a game."

"Oh it's gotta be the game of life. Just so I can kick your…"

"Don't say it." Lena said.

"Ass." I said as Jesus and I both starting laughing. Lena shakes her head.

"What did I get myself into with you?" She says slowly

"Ten years in you should know." I grin. She kisses me again before looking around.

"I'm going to start dinner." She grins. As the rest of the kids come into the house. I help Jude with his history and make sure the others have done their homework before we go into the dinning room for dinner and then a rather loud and funny game of Game of Life which I won and Lena and I laughed a lot at. I've had a great evening and it's made me realise something. I may not be able to work but I'm totally in love with my family. As each of my kids kiss me goodnight I look over at Lena. She grins at me.

"How are you feeling now babe?" she asked,

"This family is more important to me than anything. I think nights like tonight remind me how lucky I am. I've got an amazing woman, brilliant kids and just an amazing life." I move towards Lena and take her hand. "I'm sorry I have black times."

"It was going to happen. all you have to remember is I love you."

"I've got a meeting tomorrow with Captain Roberts."

"What could happen?"

"I could lose my job, be discharged from service because I can't walk."

"Is that why you've been trying so hard." Lena said. I nodded. "I know you love your job Stef. I'm sure they will find something for you to do. Who says that in Six months you won't be back on your feet."

"That could be too late."

"It will never been too late for me Stef."

"I'm so lucky to have found you." She grins.

"Right lets get you in the bath and then bed. you need your rest."

"Yes boss." I grin.

"Yeh you know it." I laughed as we make our way upstairs to our bedroom.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10.

Lena's parents are due today. I'm dreading it as much as her. they haven't seen us since before the shooting but I know Lena has kept them updated. It's not her father I have a problem with. He will be marrying us on Saturday which is two days away. but her mother. Dana has already made some comments that have upset Lena and she won't talk to me about them. Which worries me but it's always the same. Whatever Lena does Dana would never be happy. Lena's got a PhD and her mother still isn't impressed. I'm in the kitchen putting together gift bags for our guests. Mike's in the garden, he is helping Brandon put all the tables and chairs out. Plus sorting out the area where Lena and I will marry. Lena comes down with a box. Putting it onto our breakfast bar.

"What you got there love?" I ask

"Some photos from throughout our relationship."

"What really?" I move same of the bags and make space for her to put it so I can see. As I'm sat on my stool and don't want to get into my chair. She comes over putting the box down.

"Yeh, Stef. I've kept a lot of our memories." She reaches into the box and pulls out an album. She opened it and I smiled. It's me with the worst haircut I've ever had. Ten years ago, when we'd first met I had a terrible haircut. I'd been trying to hide who I really was, so was hiding my face. Lena had never liked it. so I'd grown it and she had fallen in love with it after that. The photo showed me stood with Lena both of us smiling down the camera, our heads close. We looked more like close friends than lovers. Then I remembered that day. We'd not become lovers at that point.

"Wow, you know. Looking at that. It's like looking at two best friends just standing together. You'd never know I loved you from the moment I'd met you." I say. Smiling. Lena grins at the use of my song lyrics.

"I believe at that time we'd not made love." I turn the page and grin at the photo of us when we'd first moved here. It was us on the sofa, I don't know who took it but I've got my legs on Lena's lap and we look so relaxed.

"We must have done it by then." I laugh. We look more like a couple.

"Yeh wow, you look very comfy it's always you're feet on my lap."

"I know they are happy there." I grin. Looking through the photos. Our whole relationship documented through photos, right up to a recent one of us at the mini golf course kissing. Which I'm sure one of the kids must have taken. I laugh. Lena looks at me. that was our last family outing. It seemed like a lifetime ago. But we have time to make more memories.

I'm in our room. My mom and Lena's mom are rowing over flowers. The wedding is one day away and I'm just wishing it was here because I can't cope with the raised voices. It's okay when it's myself and Lena or the kids. But these are our parents and they've gone crazy. It's driving us both mad. I've decided to go for a lay down. Lena walks in.

"What are they shouting about now?" I ask

"Lilly's or daisy's or something. I don't' care anymore." She says sitting on the bed next to me.

"It's our wedding right?"

"Yeh?"

"Can't we just run away?" I ask. Lena asked.

"You couldn't get far."

"I can wheel fast." She laughs. Laying beside me.

"Have you heard from your dad?" She asked.

"I've asked him not to come unless he can be behind our wedding 100 per cent. I don't want anyone who isn't completely happy for us there. This is our big day. We're finally showing the world how much we love each other."

"So if he can get behind us, he will come if not he won't." Lena says as she links her fingers with mine. We are lay in the middle of our bed, fully clothed, holding hands. This feels wonderful. I turn my head

"Yeh. I can't wait to marry you Lena. You're the love of my life."

"It's taken you a long time to get here." I look into those dark eyes that make me melt.

"getting shot, losing the use of my legs has made me grip life by the throat and start living everyday. You're my forever. I've written my vows."

"Wow, so that's what you been doing while I've been having my dress fittings."

"Yes." I grin. I'm looking forward to see Lena in her dress. I've seen it hanging up as she's seen my outfit. I can now dress myself, so I get the full affect tomorrow. I'm loving this moment. Us just lay together.

"This is great." Lena smiled.

"What?"

"Laying here with you, listening to our mothers rowing over something so small as our flowers when everything else is ready. Holding your hand and just having you."

"You've always had me."

"I love you." Lena grinned, she slowly moves closer and kisses me. before curling into me. I look up as I know someone is in the doorway. I look up and see Mariana.

"You okay Miss Thing?" I asked She comes in and smiles as Lena doesn't move. we're having a cuddle and right now I'm not letting her go I'm comfy.

"Yeh. Why are grans yelling at each other?"

"We've given up knowing lovely." I say. Lena laughs.

"Something to do with flowers." Lena says her head now on my shoulder as we look at our daughter.

"they are really going for it."

"Your grandfather can split them up I can't be bothered moving." Lena says. it's so unlike her. I grin. I start playing with her amazing curly hair.

"You're really going to let them fight it out."

"Yep." I say. "Your mama and I are relaxing. Enjoying each other and I can't move and she can't be bothered too. so yeh. Maybe they will come to the scenes and realise it doesn't matter." Mariana laughed.

"I'm going to go and find Granddad."

"Good plan babe." I laugh as she leaves. I smile at Lena who has closed her eyes. I know she's not sleeping great. She thinks I don't know but I do. Magic of living with someone for so long. I want to let her sleep in my arms. So that's what I'm going to do. I'm gently rubbing her hair, I know she's fully gone off when her grip on my shirt drops and she snuggles closer her leg going between mine. I just lay back. taking in her scent. Her being this close to me and enjoying it. I hear someone come in, it's my mother.

"Oh sorry."

"It's okay she's sleeping," I whisper. My mother looks at me.

"She's crazy." Whispers back

"Lena?" I'm so confused.

"No her mother."

"Oh Dana. Well you need to sort it out. The kids have heard you fighting. Lena and I just wanted some quite time and it takes me 10 minutes to get up here."

"I'm sorry, I just don't think Lily's are for a wedding."

"We don't care mom. As long as we both turn up, nothing else matters." She looks at me.

"Will you wear a dress?"

"Mom, we've been through this okay, I'm wearing pants."

"Pants, seriously."

"Mom, it's mine and Lena's day. She's wearing a lovely dress and I've decided on pants. I want to be comfy. I have to sit in my chair and marry the woman I want to marry. Pants would be better than a dress. Plus need easy access on the wedding night." She laughs.

"Stephanie"

"What?" I look at Lena, who looks so peaceful.

"You never knew love till you found her did you?" I turn to my mom who is looking at us curled up together. She's never really seen us like this. Lena and I have always been so private.

"I don't think so. I loved Mike but not the way I love Lena. I should have come out sooner."

"I'd have loved you no matter what,"

"I know Mom it's more Dad."

"I know your father is an ass. I know what he did when he found you and Tess. He shouldn't have."

"He says he didn't want me to make the wrong choices."

"Being gay isn't a choice Stef."

"I know Mom. He didn't get it."

"You've uninvited him to the wedding."

"Yes." I say, not needed to explain my actions to my mother. The only person I need to do that too is currently sleeping in my arms.

"It doesn't matter who you love, as long as they love you back Stef and she does."

"Thanks Mom."

"I'm sorry you won't be able to walk tomorrow."

"Me two, but I've got to listen to my body. I start my desk job in two weeks and work are going to be great about me going to the hospital everyday."

"Do you have any movement." She asked slowly.

"None." I let out a deep breath.

"I'm always here Stef, even when I go home."

"I know Mom. Thanks."

"It's okay, just look after your woman."

"I've been doing that for ten years."

"Well keep doing it." With that she got up kissed me and left. I just lay there with Lena sleeping starting to think that yeh. Tomorrow really is the start of the rest of my life with my woman. With the one person in this world who has ever made my heart beat faster, made my knees go weak. Who makes me laugh and cry. Makes me angry, shows me pleasure. Without this woman I'm nothing. With her I'm everything. I can't wait to tell her tomorrow in my vows. The one part of the wedding she has no control over is what I'm going to say and I'm going to be honest and tell her, she completely completes me. she's my everything. I close my eyes and feel myself drifting off as our mothers start again this time over the wine that has just arrived. I should go down and pull them apart but to be honest. I'd rather lay here.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

Today's the day. Wow it really is. I'm going to marry Lena Adams. I've let Lena have our bedroom to get ready. I'm dressed, hair and make up done and I'm now downstairs with my parents-in-law, my mother and the kids are coming down one by one dressed. the people who are going to do the food and waiting are outside setting everything up. Stewart has paid for everything. He had saved for Lena's wedding for years and he wanted what was best for her. Mariana walked in, she's wearing a dress and looks so lovely.

"Hey Mom, wow you look great." She says taking in my white pants and top. I'm wearing the necklace that Lena had bought me years ago however my hands feel bare. As I've taken my ring off my right hand as of today I will wear a wedding ring on my left hand.

"Thanks, you look pretty too." She kisses me.

"Are you nervous?"

"About what?" I ask, as I move my chair so she can get to the fridge.

"Marrying Mom," Mariana grinned. I looked at her.

"I can't wait to be Mrs Adams Fosters. Plus I've been with you mom for a long time."

"You're scared aren't you." Jesus said. Laughing.

"I'm scared I'll curse or something and she'll give me that look." I laugh. He grins. Brandon walks in looking good in a three piece suit.

"Wow mom you look awesome." He kisses me.

"So do you B." I look up and there is Lena. Oh my God. My heart stops. She looks stunning in a off white lacy dress that goes down to the floor. She got a dress jewellery necklace, her hair half up and down with lovely crystals in her hair. I'm speechless. She looks stunning. I know my mouth must have fallen open because everyone is looking at me. I can't say anything this is so amazing. this woman in front of me is mine.

"Speechless babe?" She says. I just nod. She walks over and kisses me.

"Can you two do that later?" Jesus says.

"Yeh in public." Lena grins. I'm still taking her in. I can't take my eyes from her. I've seen this dress hanging up but it looks so much better on her. my mother rubs my shoulder.

"Stef you need to say something."

"Lena looks so sexy." I manage. Lena starts laughing. She kisses me.

"I'm glad you like the dress babe."

"Like it. it's stunning, just like the woman in it." she smiles. My mom winks at me. as the doorbell rings out and our guests start to arrive.

We're doing this. I'm sat waiting for Lena to come out. Stewart is watching me. Lena comes out and we sit together. I love that this is happening. Stewart opens the wedding with a speech he sounds so proud of Lena throughout it. then Dana and my mom, make speeches. My mum making everyone laugh and making Dana frown. Then it's our turn. We're facing each other and sitting so close our hands linked together.

"Stephanie Marie Foster, you're a piece of work. But you're my piece of work. I accept you, every single things that makes you who you are from now until the end of time." She's got tears running down her face as she whispers "I love you." I can't help but rub her hands.

"Lena, I know we've been through a lot in the last few months but I couldn't have done any of that without you. You really are the person who keeps me going. You're the person I've been waiting for my whole life and I am so proud to be sitting up here in front of our friends and family to make sure they know how lucky I feel to have found you, and just how much I love you." I'm crying now. I thought I wouldn't do this but I have.

"Can we have the rings please." Stewart asked. Jude stepped forward as Lena and broke apart I took the ring he passed to me then he started searching his other pocket we both start laughing. He knows how to lighten the mood. He finds the ring and gives it to Lena. Who tries to put it onto my finger. We start laughing again.

"It's the wrong one." We laugh as we swop rings. "You'll never get that on my finger." I laugh. Finally we get our matching rings. She takes my hands. I look deep into her eyes and say "Thank you." She smiles at me. it's like we've forgotten we've got loads of guests watching us. I'm lost in her eyes, her face showing her emotions as always.

"I think it's high time that someone kissed someone." Stewart said making Lena laugh. We both moved at the same time. my hand going to her face as she pulled me into her kissing me. everyone started clapping we broke away and she rested her forehead on mine. Our arms rubbing each others I'm married. I'm married to this amazing woman. I turn my head and look my family, my babies who all look so happy. I'm happy. For the first time in weeks. I'm overjoyed. This woman is now my wife.

I'm grinning watching the kids dancing. They all look like they are having a great time. Lena is sat next to me with her hand on my leg. We're watching everyone. I've got a glass of Champaign in my hand. The doctors have finally taken me off my meds, so I'm able to drink. I'm loving it.

"I'm sorry he didn't come." She says. I know she's talking about my dad

"I'm sorry too, sorry for him." She smiles. I move in for a quick kiss she grins before looking over at Mike, who is talking to her parents and being watching by the captain. I don't know what's going on. Suddenly the music goes quite and there is our daughter.

"Excuse me everyone, I just want to say that I love my moms and that I'm so happy that they've got married. You've given me and my siblings a home. You've given us so much love and we're proud that you are our moms." After she finished speaking Same Love came on and Lena and I moved into middle of the grass where all five our babies join us. We hug and dance. It's amazing. these moments remind me how lucky I am. We're moving together. I'm doing my best in my wheelchair. Lena comes over and kisses me. before slowly helping me up, wrapping her arms around my waist I hold onto her, with my arms around her neck. I forget that this slight woman is stronger than she looks. In the middle of our lawn, with everyone watching. Slowly she moves my hips and we move to the music. The kids all move so everyone can see our first dance. I can't move my legs but I'm standing in my wife's arms slowly dancing. Even if she is holding me up.

"You keep me warm." I whisper as our bodies come together.

"Good, I love you Stef Adams-Foster."

"I'm rubbish at this dancing."

"You're doing great Stef." We kiss. Before she gently helps me sit back down. I look at her. totally lost in her eyes.

"I love you so much Lena."

"Good, I'll show you how much later." Lena winked before moving off as the song ended. We started to talk to our guests and get involved with everyone. I'm married. For the second time. this time feels so right. I'm married to the woman who makes me feel more alive. I can't wait for the rest our lives.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12.

Lena and I have had one final surprise from her parents. Tonight they have booked us into a five star hotel in town. With all the trimmings. They basic got us the honeymoon suit. I couldn't believe it when the car turned up to take us there and we had no idea. How could we have no idea. Dana and my mom had even packed bags for us. How rude? I had to laugh. What else was I to do. Now we're in an expensive suite enjoying the first bless of our married hours together.

"You looked stunning today Lena," I said smiling at her. she grins back at me as I'm now sat on the bed with my chair to one side. I'm sat on the bed rather happily watching her putting our bags to one side.

"So did you my love." She grins as she slowly opens my shirt. I love the feeling of Lena's fingers on my skin. She gently pushed the shirt back. revealing my plan white bra. It's nothing special. I watch slowly as she removes it. taking my breasts into her hands she slowly moves her fingers over my nipples. I moan she smiles. She pulls away , so I can look at her. I'm grinning at her. she removes her dress and reveals her sexy underwear. Wow. She looks stunning. She helps me with my trousers and helps me swing my legs onto the bed. Lena pulls my panties down as she removes her underwear. She opens my legs. Kissing my knees. Before laying above me. I push her hair out of my face. She kisses my nose before kissing my lips. It's such a passionate kiss. Our tongues are moving together. My hands move to her shoulders as she kisses down my neck and chest. She stops at my stomach. why has she stopped. Have I turned her off. Suddenly I feel her lips on my scar. Oh shit she's kissing it. I look down and her mass of hair is over my scar and breasts. She licks my scar before kissing my stomach and moves down.

"Lena, baby, what are you doing to me?"

"Loving you sexy." She kisses, just the top of my pubic area. She moans. "You smell so good Stef, you're mine. All mine." She puts my leg over her shoulder.

"Babe." She stops.

"what lovely?"

"Together the first time. please." She moves back up my body. Hocking my legs around her. I feel surround by her. she takes my hand. Kissing it before she then moves it down her body. Together we both entre each other with two fingers. Lena's back aches as we slowly move in and out of each other. She suddenly stops. Pulling out of me. I look disappointed but she sits up, and helps me into a sitting position. She makes sure we are both comfy before we start making love again. our bodies together. We are kissing. Holding each other. Sweat slowly pouring down our faces. It's slow and passionate. This is how it was supposed to be. We're looking deep into each other's eyes as we slowly make love to each other. I feel so good.

"Babe, I'm so close." I whisper.

"Good," Lena smiles "cum for me Stef. I love you so much." We come at the same time. our bodies shaking. I fall back onto the bed, not able to stay up. I feel Lena kissing me. holding me.

"Happy Mrs Adams-Foster?" I ask, she is smiling

"Sure am. Look at you babe, who wouldn't be?" I grin.

"Give me five minutes and we can start again." I say as my breathing starts to slowly down.

"Good."

I wake slowly in the lush, large hotel room. I look down my left hand and smile. Still inter locked with mine is Lena's left hand. Our wedding rings resting against each other. I love it. my pale skin against her lovely mocha skin. I love this woman. She makes me complete. I move slowly. As best I can. I feel her lips on my shoulder. Softly brushes of her lips along my shoulder blade. Our bodies are so close. Her keeping me safe.

"Good morning wifey." I can hear the grin in her voice. As she kisses the back of my neck. Her hand moving to my breast. I smile as she takes my whole breast into her hand. It's rare for me to lay in my side now but this feels right.

"Morning sexy lady. Do I know you?" I grin.

"Well I hope so because last night you signed legal papers making you my wife."

"Oh, sorry I don't know who you are?" I laugh. I know my smart mouth will get me in trouble but I love that I can have this banter with her

"I'm Mrs Lena Elizabeth Adams-Foster, who is now married to Mrs Stephanie Marie Adams-Foster."

"Oh that's me." I laugh

"Yes it is." She gently rubs my breast making me moan. I love that she's so gentle with me. her hand slips down my stomach moving my legs apart. She finds my clit and gently rubs it as my head goes back.

"Lena" I moan. She giggles softly.

"What?" She carries on rubbing. Knowing she is hitting that amazing spot that only she has ever been able to hit.

"Oh God. You know what," She laughs. Kissing me as she rubs that little bit harder. "Ahhh." I come, within about three minutes of her starting to touch me. we've made love that much throughout the evening that me coming so soon was not a shock. She giggles as she moves her fingers away.

"Revenge."

"For what?" I said slowly, as I rest back against the pillow and she moves her hand to my stomach.

"Forgetting your married." She laughed. I smiled. We moved so that I could lay on my back.

"I will never forget I'm married to you babe." I grin. she kisses my lips.

"good, we better get up. we've got to get home soon."

"I don't want too." I said, pulling out my bottom lip to make me look like a sulky three year old.

"Well you have too." She grinned. I laughed. That's my Lena. "Plus I'd quite like to open our wedding gifts and see the kids and make sure your mom and my mom haven't killed each other."

"Wouldn't surprise me. they've been pains since we decided to get married."

"They are just two very different people." Lena smiled.

"Good thing their daughters love each other."

"I wouldn't want it any other way." Lena grinned. "Fancy a bath before we go."

"Yeh, oh can we order room service."

"Yeh dad said he has paid for us to eat as well. So I'll get you're the menu while run the bath."

"Oh you know how to treat a woman." I grin. she smiling back at me. she kissed me. I love that smile.

"You know it. it's you that thinks cheap wine and burgers are the way to a woman's heart."

"Only the best for you my love." She grins again before getting up and giving me a great view of her amazing back and ass. I'm one lucky woman.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

We arrived back at the house to what looked like a massive row between my mother and Dana. The kids where all playing board game with their grandfather when Lena and I came in. me wheeling myself in and laughing at a comment Lena had made. I stopped dead when I heard the yelling from the kitchen. Everyone looked at us and I watch Stewart roll his eyes.

"What the hell is going on?" I ask, I can see Lena's not happy I've cursed but I can't cope with other people rowing in our house.

"Gran and Nana are rowing over what we want for dinner." Brandon said as Callie took her go.

"You've got to be kidding me." I say. Rolling into the kitchen to find them fighting over our beloved table. They are yelling at each other about what and who is cooking. This can't be happening. I've had a lovely relaxing day with my new wife and now I've come home to this mess. Lena and I both just stop and watch them. I roll forward and stop. "You two need to sort this shit out."

"Stef." Lena said as I say it. they both stop and looking at me. cursing is something I tend to try not to do in front of Lena. As she is against it. but sometimes I need to use it."

"Sorry?" Dana said looking at me. like I'd just slapped her.

"Our five children are playing a game in the next room listening to you two yelling at each other over something so silly as who and what we're having for dinner. Did you ever think that our children, your grandchildren could hear you." I said slowly. My arms folded, they both look down. As Stewart walks into the room.

"We've come home from a lovely night and day at a lovely hotel that you and dad have paid for and now you're rowing like children." Lena said slowly.

"I just want everything to be perfect for you." Dana said.

"Stop bring us into this. You didn't know when we were coming back." Lena said. I look up at her. she gently rubs my shoulder. She's had enough. I can tell. Dana and my mother fighting all the time has been happening since they first met ten years ago however now It's just getting silly.

"We…" Dana stops. And I look at Stewart who is shaking his head.

"I don't want to hear it. go and cool off. Stef and I will sort dinner out please. Just go." Both of them went into the garden. I took a deep breath and looked at Stewart.

"I think you should check on them Stewart."

"Will do, did you two have a nice evening?"

"Yeh thanks dad." Lena said hugging her father. He hugs me before going outside.

"I expect our children to row like that." I said as I move to the fridge to see what we have in.

"I can't believe we've come home to that. Not the welcome home I was expecting."

"No that's for sure." I turn when I hear someone come into the room it's Jude.

"Hey Sweetie."

"Hey." He smiles. I look at Lena. We have come to the conclusion after a long chat with the twins and Brandon we've decided that we're going to adopt him and Callie. We just haven't told them yet. I look at Lena. She nods. "Did you have a good night?"

"We did." I smile. "How about you?"

"Yeh, I loved yesterday. Thank you for letting me be apart of it."

"You did great buddy." I grin. I feel Lena walk over.

"We should tell them." She whispers. I nod. "Jude, babe. Can you get the gang together we want to talk to you all."

"Okay." He runs off.

"Sure about this baby?" I asked

"Yes as sure I was with the twins. This feels right."

"I love you."

"I love you too." she kisses me as the kids all pile into the kitchen and sit in the window seats. I wheel myself forward. Grinning. As Lena stands beside me. the last time we all sat here we told them we couldn't offer them a home but now we were going to do it.

"Okay, Callie, Jude we've spoken to the twins and Brandon about this." Lena started. She's got tears in her eyes. I can see from the looks on Callie and Jude's face that says we are going to leave them. I take over after holding my wife's hands for a moment.

"We want to know how you would feel about making this a more permanent arrange."

"Like adopt us?" Jude asked grinning and looking at Callie. Callie looked at Brandon and the Twins.

"are you guys okay with this." They all nodded

"There is enough to go around." Brandon said, smiling. Jude and Callie looked at each other I just want them to say they want too.

"So?" Lena said. Suddenly the both start nodding and Callie says Yes. and they are running into our arms. We're hugging them and the laughter breaks out as Lena's parents and my mother comes in.

"What's going on?" Dana asked. Jude is so excited.

"They're adopting us. They're going to keep us. We have a family. I've got two Moms. Two amazingly brilliant Moms to love." I look at him "And they don't care that I like nail polish and I think I'm gay. Wow I've got the family I've always wanted." we all look at him in shock. Did he just say what I thought he just say. My son is gay. I hug him pulling him close.

"It's completely up to you what you call us." I say. To both Callie and him. "But we love you, as much as we love the twins and B. no matter what okay?" they both nod. I can see the excitement. "Right I think take out is in order."

"We'll pay." Stewart says at once. "In honour of our two newest grandkids." I smile. Why can't my father be like this.

"Can I call you…erm…" Jude stopped looking at Stewart who looked at him.

"What buddy?"

"Can I can call you Grandpa like the others."

"Sure you're my daughters son so yeh." Jude hugged him and I found myself crying. Lena puts her arms around me. we've got a our family. None of us perfect.

"You big softly." Lena grins.

"I'm a tough cop you know."

"Mom, non of us believe you." Brandon said I smiled at him.

"Thanks, I thought my own son would have my back."

"I can't help it when Mama is right." He laughed. Looking at Lena. Who just grinned at him. Mariana hugged me.

"You are a massive softly mom."

"Thanks, everyone having a go."

"Okay I will too." Jesus says laughing. "Mom you're softer than the expensive cheese Mama buys." Everyone laughs.

"Right I'm having take out you lot are having my left overs." I said. I move over to the draw with the take out menus.

"But Mom." Mariana said. I just smile Callie comes over and helps me get the menu's out.

"What do you want Callie as you're the only one not to call me soft?"

"I hate to tell you Stef but you are." I grin at her before hugging her.

"I bet you all wouldn't have it any other way." Lena came up to me. kissing my lips. Her parents and my mother watching us with our family.

"I love you just the way you are Stef, crazy smart mouth cop, who makes me smile and laugh daily."

"Aww you've gone all mushy." Jesus said.

"No Pizza for you young man." I'm smiling as I speak.

"Get used to it. your mom and I are on honeymoon." Lena kisses me again before I give the Pizza menu to the children. I pulled Lena onto my knee. Holding her close. Watching as our children argue over the pizza toppings. I move my wheelchair with Lena will on my lap over to the kids as Stewart becomes the ref and soon we are finally ordering five different pizzas and trying to find a movie that everyone wants to watch. I managed to get onto the sofa and snuggle with Lena. While Dana and my mother finally stop rowing long enough to get us pizza and juice. This really is the life for me. my amazing family making me feel so needed, loved and wanted.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

Lena's has gone back to work. Our children back to school, my mother and Lena's family have gone home. I've decided that I can't go to my desk job and Lena has respected that. I joined the police because I wanted to catch criminals. I can't do that anymore, it didn't feel right. So at the moment they have put me back onto the sickness roster which I'm fine with. I've been to physiotherapy. Which has made me tired. But I can't keep going to sleep after. I've now got a small car which has been modified for me. I can get my chair in and I can drive just using my hands. I'm starting to get my life back on track. I've decided I'm going to see my father. I've not seen him since before the wedding. I arrive at his house and for the first time in years I've had to use the front door. Dad looks at me.

"Hey." He said.

"Hi, we need to have a chat." I said. He moved letting me into the house. We make it to his kitchen and he gets me a juice.

"What do you want to talk about Stef?" He looked at me. I start to play with my wedding ring.

"I can't do this anymore."

"Do what?"

"Lena's my wife. She's my lover. She's my best friend. She's the first thing I think about when I wake up in the morning and she's the last thing I think about before falling asleep."

"What are you getting at Stef?" He asked. I can see he can't be bothered with this conversation. I've decided we're having it. for too long I've watched him look down on our relationship. Now it's my time. I need to do this for myself.

"Lena is my wife, dad. Like mom was yours. We have a marriage certificate. Our relationship is legal."

"Not in the eyes of God." I roll my eyes.

"Dad I don't care. I'm gay. I'm a lesbian. I've got an amazing woman. An amazing family. Dad I'm your only child. I tired to do my best to be the daughter you wanted but I can't do that anymore." I look down. "I've been shot dad, I can't walk. But you've barely been to see me. you can't cope because of my wife at home. I don't want to lose you dad. I'm gay you need to get used to that."

"You chose to be gay."

"We've been through this. It's not a choice." I moved my hair over my shoulder. "I've never been so happy. I'm married to the love of my life, dad. I stood in front of my family and friends and told them and the rest of the world how proud I am to be with Lena. I love her Dad. You're my father. You don't have like my choices but you should respect them."

"I have never said anything bad about Lena."

"No dad. But you barely acknowledge her. she's the mother of my children dad. She keeps me warm at night. Since I was shot she's been there every step of the way. She has seen me at my worse recently I've fallen apart. All you have to do dad is look at her like you did with Mike."

"That was different."

"How?" I snap back.

"He was your husband…"

"Lena is my wife."

"Marriage is between a man and a woman." He said

"The law states I can marry her dad. Which I've done. I'm sorry that you can't put your beliefs to one side. I can't do this anymore. I want you in my life. I want you in my children's life's but you have to get over the fact that we're a lesbian couple. I want you in my life dad. But this negativity needs to stop. I'm going home dad. If you want to talk please come to our house. Whenever you're ready. We'll answer any questions you have but it will be Lena and me. bye dad." I turned and left. I had to say something to him. I'm fed up with his attitude to my relationship and now Lena is my wife It's time I stuck up for her a little more. When I arrive home Lena's car is in the drive. I pull in behind it and get out it always takes me a little longer as I'm moving myself over to my wheelchair I see her coming towards me grinning.

"Where have you been?" She asked.

"Most people say Hello darling how are you?" I said grinning.

"Okay, if that's what you want. Hello dear, How are you?"

"I'm okay love how are you?"

"Okay, thank you." She kissed me and I love that. "Right where have you been?"

"I went to see my dad." I said, looking down at my hands. She lifts up my chair.

"Wanna talk about it?"

"Yeh." We went inside and she made some coffee. I just sat on the sofa in the living room. Trying not to let my father's words get to me. Lena came walking in with two mugs of coffee. She sits down.

"What happened babe?" She asked as she took my hand. I looked at our interlocked hands.

"I told him your my wife, lover and best friend and he just said his usual crap about marriage being between a man and a woman. It just made me so mad."

"You know I love you and not you family right?" I look at her and she's grinning. I smile at her before kissing her.

"Thanks." We laugh. I know the kids will be back soon. Lena is not doing full hours at the moment.

"Pleasure." She smiled at me. "Stef you dad isn't going to change. He sees you being gay as a choice. He doesn't understand that it's not. I know you want him too and you do things for him to try and make him see what's in front of his, his only child but I think he can't get passed the you're gay bit."

"I want him to love. I want him too see my amazing family and how happy you make me?"

"He sees that but something is stopping him from enjoying it."

"God." I said slowly

"That's his problem babe, not ours."

"Why are you so wise?"

"Because you go the smart mouth." She is laughing now I can't help but grin I kiss her again. what would I do without her. "How was physiotherapy today?"

"Not great, I stood for a few moments but my legs gave in. they wanna run some tests on my back."

"See how much damage has really been done?"

"Yeh, but I don't want to go…"

"I'll go with you." She knows me too well

"Thanks." I lean against her. "I feel like a frailer."

"You've got to stop thinking like that Stef?"

"I can't help it okay?"

"No it's not okay." She's mad now I can feel it.

"I…"

"Please Stef listen. You're not a frailer. You're an amazing woman who went to that house that night because you thought our son was in danger. You didn't think twice about storming in there to save him. You're a great parent to all five of our children. You're the best friend I've always wanted. you're the lover that keeps me satifed and you're the wife who makes me laugh and cry. You've done so much good already. You've got your weak spots but you don't ever need to change. I love you. I don't care if you never walk again, you know why?"

"Why?" I whisper

"Because I've got you." She touches my face. "And you Stef Adams-Foster are all I've ever wanted or needed. So no you're not a frailer, you're a winner. I never want to stop loving you like I do now. So we go to the doctor they do their tests and we find out if you'll walk again. if it's a no we start to work out what you can do next. If it's a yes we find out what you have to do next. We are in this together. You, me and our five crazy kids. Don't forget that. They need you as much as I do. So please start being positive." Wow that's some speech from my wife. She seriously has a lot of passion in her. which has always made me love her more. I kiss her passionately.

"I'll try for you, me and them"

"Good because you know what Stef. As long as I have you, I can live with anything." I kiss her again

"The appointment is Monday."

"I'll be there what time?"

"10am"

"I'll take the morning off."

"You're too good to me."

"Oh babe, I can be very bad if you want." She raises her eyebrow and then suddenly picks me up. taking me upstairs. I've lost a lot of weight since the shooting and she makes it look effortless. She dumps me on the bed shuts the door and then just looks at me. I grin. this is going to be amazing.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

I am so tired. We've spent most of the day at the hospital. I've had so many tests. Lena holding my hand through most of them. I've been poked and scanned. I'm just glad to be home. I'm now lay on the sofa. On my back with my head in Lena's lap and her fingers are softly playing with my blonde locks. I'm looking up at her. she's also rubbing my stomach. she's so loving. Ten years on and she's still the same woman I meet in the school yard. The woman who stole my heart. The only woman I've ever been with. I put my hand on top of hers which was resting on my stomach. playing with her wedding ring. The silence between us is lovely. I look up into her eyes. She's smiling at me.

"I'm glad I've got you." I whisper.

"I wouldn't want or need anyone else Stef. You're crazy personality keeps me on my toes."

"I want to walk again." I tell her.

"Well we will wait for the results and see if there is anything they can do. If we can get you on your feet we will."

"Thank you." I move her hand to lips. Kissing it softly. Kissing her wedding ring. I close my eyes. Completely relaxed. I drop Lena's hand back onto my stomach. she starts rubbing it again.

"The kids will be home soon."

"Aww I was enjoying the silence."

"Don't get used to it Stef. We have five kids."

"Five amazing kids." I smile. Just as I relax completely our front door opens and slams shut. I open my eyes. Looking around I see Mariana she looks mad.

"What's up Miss Thing?" I ask, she comes in. sitting on the chair she looked so mad.

"Why can girls be such…such…" Mariana couldn't find the right work. I know she wants to curse.

"I wouldn't curse love, what is it?" I said. Lena smiling

"Are you okay?" Lena asked.

"yeh, I just don't like that some people have a problem that I have two moms."

"What's going on?" Lena asked. Knowing that it could be a school matter.

"oh just some kids at school. I'm okay really."

"don't let them get to you." I said I was going to get up but Lena wasn't letting me.

"You both look relaxed. How was the hospital?" I can tell our daughter wants us to change the subject.

"Yeh. We have to wait for the results but I think it could be positive." I smile at Lena's words.

"Good" Mariana gets up and kisses us both. "I have homework to do."

"Okay, Mama's doing chicken for dinner."

"Excellent." I sit up as she goes. I pull myself over to my chair. Lena is watching me. I kiss her before heading to the bathroom. By the time I'm out again all our children are home and my babies chatter and laughter fills the house. I decide to go and help with dinner.

I wheel myself into our bedroom and smile, my wife is sat crossed legged on my side of the bed folding clothes.

"What you doing on my side of the bed?"

"I was hoping you wouldn't make it up the stairs." She laughs. Its not like her to have such a smart mouth."

"Oh because I'm slowly you're all like I can take her side of the bed as well."

"Your side feels better than mine." I move over to my side of the bed and kiss her head before pushing her over to her side she giggles. I love that sound.

"Get of my side please."

"But Mama Tiger."

"Oh don't start." I smiled. As I move myself over to the bed. it's then I notice something as I take of my flip flops. Wow did that just happen. I do it again. I'm shocked. My face must show in.

"What is it?" Lena asked rubbing my back. I can't speak. How do I tell her? wow I can't even believe it. I'm just sat there looking at my feet. "Stef talk to me babe."

"I…" I can't.

"What is it?" I can hear the panic in her voice. Shit I've panicked her.

"I just…moved…my toe." I managed slowly

"What?" Lena jumped off the bed and ran around to look and I did it again. I love it. I'm moving both of my big toes. Lena looks at me. "Wow. Baby." She jumps onto me and kisses me. I love it. I love you. Wow Stef I could happen. you're moving your toes." I hug her and kiss her

"I can't believe it." we are giggling. I've moved. Even if it was just my toes.

"Oh Stef. My baby." She kisses me again. I'm in shock. Totally this could really be the start of me getting my movement back.

"I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you." Was all I could say as I kissed her over and over again. she's laughing as we both fall back. we are both laughing.

"I love you too Stef. Do it again." I do now all five toes moving. I'm grinning. I feel very proud of myself. "Whoever thought we'd get this excited over you moving your toes."

"I don't know babe. Wow I can move." Lena kisses me again knowing this is the start of something amazing.

"It's going to be hard work now babe."

"With you at my side I can do anything. Wow Lena, love."

"I know. I know." She kisses me again.


	16. Chapter 16

Epilogue.

Wow. It's been a year since I got shot. I've found myself dealing with so much in that time. Lena and I have got married. Jude and Callie are now Adams-Foster's. but the main things is I can walk. It's been a slow process but since I moved my toes I've managed to get up and about and with the help of my cane I get around quite well. I'm not as fast as I would like. I've fallen over a lot. But I've done it. I was determined. I'm not sure if or when I'll go back to work. Tonight we're having a party this evening to celebrate. All our friends have arrived and we've got the grill on. The kids are all around and helping out. Lena still wont' let me over work myself. I'm enjoying being sat with her. our friends chatting around us. I'm not listening. I'm holding Lena's hand and watching Jude, Jesus and Brandon playing basket ball. Mariana and Callie are sat talking. They are getting on better and better and I'm glad. Lena knows I'm not listening. She moves her lips to my ear.

"Babe these people are here to help you celebrate."

"Sorry." I said. Looking at her.

"I was watching the kids."

"I know you," I notice that suddenly I'm alone with Lena. Our friends going off to talk to other people. "I love you, and I'm so proud of you."

"I know it's been hard for you babe."

"I wouldn't have it any other way Stef."

"I'm glad. What would I do with out you?"

"I'm not sure." I laugh at her.

"you're awesome you know that."

"I do." I kiss her.

"Seriously Mom do you have too, we have guests." I look up at Jesus. Who is smiling at us.

"I can't kiss your mama. But it's my favourite thing to do."

"can't you find another hobby."

"What rather than kissing your mother. But it's my favourite hobby. "

"I don't care Mom. Not in public."

"I'm not hiding who I am in my own house." I smile. "Plus look I fancy your mama and I want to kiss her a lot, and hug her and make sure she knows she's loved and that she belongs. Like we do with you and Mariana, Callie, Jude and Brandon. I'll kiss you all if I have too."

"I'd rather you didn't." Jesus. Said. "Hugging I can handle."

"Oh give your old Mom a hug." He did. I'm so in love with my family. I lean against Lena watching everyone. Thinking about how lucky I really am. I've got so much better. I pull myself up and slowly walk towards Mariana and Callie. Sitting beside them.

"How are you two doing?" I ask

"Good Mom." Mariana said

"I'm fine thanks Stef." Callie and Jude are yet to call his mom but I don't mind. Callie is nearly seventeen, so I don't expect her too.

"Good. I love you both."

"Love you." I get up against and go over to the boys. Brandon hugs me I love my son so much. Jude looks at me. as I sit down on the wall and watching them shot hops. He comes over and sits next to me. I look at him and smile. He has blue nail polish on. I know he wants to say something.

"You okay bud?" I asked.

"Yeh I've been thinking."

"Okay, what about?"

"You and Lena."

"Right." I look up as Lena joins me and Jude. Taking my hand

"I want to call you Mom." He said. I smile as he hugs me. "You and Lena have been everything to me. more like my moms than I've ever had before. Plus you've adopted us so you're not going to send us away."

"We would never send you or Callie away." I grins

"Thanks Mom." Wow the first time he says it and it's made me feel so amazing. I can't believe it. I remember these feelings they were the same when Jesus, Mariana and Brandon call me mom. I kiss him before looking at Lena.

"I love you all so much." I say suddenly I'm in the middle of massive Adams-Foster hug. All five of my children, plus my wife. This feels amazing. I can't believe it I've been to hell and back to be where I am today and you know what I wouldn't change it for the world.

THE END.


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